Why does Mommy have to go out to work?

As a working mother, it is important to make your child understand early in her childhood that you step out of the house so that along with the father you can provide for the family better. It will take the child a while before she understands career aspirations, goals and several other reasons why you have to “work”.
Here are some tips that may help you:
  • Whenever possible, try to explain to the child that you go to work so that you can get her good clothes, toys and food. Tell your child that along with daddy, mom also works hard so that we can buy all the goodies that the family needs.
  • Teach your child the importance and the value of money so that she starts appreciating the fact that you earn for the family.
  • You can start by encouraging the child to have her own piggy bank and saving the money she gets as gifts or prizes.
  • Give your child examples of other working mothers and their children in your circle to make them realize that many mothers step out of home to go to work.
  • Never use words like – ‘If you don’t listen to me, I’ll go leave the house to go to work’ to discipline the child. If your child gets the feeling that you step out of the house only to punish her, she may actually come to hate you for leaving her alone at home.
  • As your child grows and has her own aspirations, she will realize why it was important for her mother to also step out so that she could fulfill her aspirations too. Over a period of time, your child will come to respect you for being a wonderful working mother.

3 comments:

Ravi said...

Frankly why does mommy have to go out to work? For mommy what comes first -- the child or the job? Accepted that it is very difficult for working women managing the professional and personal fronts, but honestly do women need to work? Those who can afford to stay at home fulltime but opt to work are more driven by their own ambitions than some desperate need to make both ends meet. Accepted mommy needs to work to bring home the goodies and pray tell me what are the goodies? A bigger home, a fancy car or a foreign trip or clothes? Not to mention the future returns for your child who would perhaps 10 years down the line that , "my mother is Indira Nooyi". Will it suffice for the emotional stress that the child undergoes, will it be enough for the love that he needs.
SHow your child examples of other working moms and their children? Very good. Then why dont we tell them about Nita Ambani and Tina. Ok if we have to learn by examples what if the child demands to be taken to school in a chauffer-driven car in a mercedes or a Skoda. Would you still teach him to learn from others. No you wont because then it doesnt fit into your scheme of things. You want your child only to learn what suits your convenience. The moment he asks anything which you can afford you will bombard him with sermons on Christian values of abstinence and the Gandhian high point of simple living high thinking.

black said...

How about the following points?

Mom likes to go to work as she enjoys working and meeting people.

Mom likes to go to work because she needs to feel valued for her abilities and skills (other than parenting alone).

Mom needs to go to work because she likes to be independent.

Mom needs to go work because she knows that a lot of things (like day to day chores) can be managed through several ways, but, she needs to manage her interests and ambitions.

Mom needs to work to take care of herself as well as the family (in that order). In this day of nuclear families, one is responsible for oneself.

Mom needs to go to work so that boys don't end up being MCPs (like this Ravi guy) and one day grow up to be on their own feet while letting others have a chance to stand on their own feet.

Moms need to go and work so that children grow up with equitable values. Children need to understand from very early on that work and life need a balance, and one cannot afford to neglect either of them.

These are all important points. Rather than scorning at why mom goes to work (especially when the child sees that she is being defensive all the time), the child sees a role model to emulate in life (child being boy or girl). They will be proud one day that the mom worked very hard to take care of them and to take care of themselves.

Amen to that and I will not waste my time responding to Ravi.

A stranger who happened to wade into your blogosphere. Three cheers to working moms, and working women and dads who take an equal share in everything (that one is for me :)).

Swati said...

I am also a mom. We have to go out for work to make more money for our kids. Has to buy products online for kids i bought from a site http://www.partybounty.com/

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